Cant save my privacy settings to allow in game chat eg ark survival ascended

im having a simmilar issue to this person here:

https://learn.microsoft.com/en-us/answers/questions/5827712/privacy-settings-change-back-after-i-change-them

ive tried doing it on xbox and throught microsofts website on my PC but for some reason when i press submit it says its saved but i refresh the page and the reset back to the same they were.

the one im trying to change is the one that allows me to see other people typing in game chat as its an pretty important aspect of ARK is to communicate.

when i try doing it on xbox i go into custom settings and change it there but when i click back out of it and then back in it has reset as well. so i tried to change from custom to adult but when i do that it says there is problem and to try again later?

any help would be greatly apreciated as i was looking forward to playing this weekend

thanks